Why are celebrities so immature
Relationship capable or not? These four behaviors show how mature you are
(djd). Flirting, dating, love, sex: these topics are often overloaded with desires, expectations, clichés and prejudices. "We often believe in an ideal that has little to do with reality and sustainable happiness," says LoveScout24 relationship expert and depth psychologist Dr. Katharina Ohana. The search for a partner is increasingly "wedged" between one's own experiences and an official ideal. Whether it is possible to have a happy partnership depends on the ability to form relationships.
Four mature / healthy and four immature behaviors when looking for a partner
Anyone looking for a partner on the Internet, for example, can, according to Ohana, behave "immature" or "ripe / healthy" when it comes to relationships. The term "immature" is not a condemnation, just a description of reality. The differences become clear in four behaviors:
Expectations from the partner
- Immature: You have high standards because you have maximized your market value in terms of body, education, earnings and status. The dream partner must meet at least 90 percent of the points on a list.
- Healthy: You would like to have a loving relationship in which everyone has their place equally and you spend a good time together, give and take, but also set limits.
- Immature: You post old photos on which you have a few years or pounds less. Children or the desire to have children are not mentioned, although they are present. Hobbies and interests are pimped up. If someone has taken something great, you slowly come out with the truth.
- Healthy: You know yourself, you know what is important to you and what is important for a long-term relationship. To do this, you create a profile that is as accurate and humorous as possible. There are important things like values, lifestyle habits, respect and a healthy sense of closeness and distance, as well as less important things like the same hobbies and interests.
Be in love
- Immature: This is how it should and always will stay, the best thing to do is marry tomorrow, then you have contractually committed to happiness.
- Healthy: I enjoy the time, but I know that I am not realistically aware of the other person (hormonal delusion). One tries to keep this pink view of the other a little bit. Everything will work out.
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- Immature: You just don't get in touch any more. Or reacts insultingly to a rejection. Or has fallen in love and remains registered.
- Healthy: You politely thank you for the nice contact or the meeting and say in a friendly manner that it doesn't fit so well after all. Or: You have fallen in love and get involved with the person, delete your profile and log out.
First caregivers have a fundamental impact
(djd). "How we love, we learn in our childhood," says LoveScout24 relationship expert Dr. Katharina Ohana. The first relationships are formative and decide whether you are able to relate straight away or whether you have to work out this later. "Anyone who was loved as a child for their own sake, who learned their own self-worth in a healthy way in the love of their parents, and who received balanced recognition and attention will very likely have good relationships later on," says Ohana. If relationships fail again and again, one can assume that something has gone wrong with the parents' love. However, you can change a lot yourself: "The maturity of our expectations is the key to happiness."
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