Only Buddhas rest in peace
15 ideas from Buddhism that make our everyday lives less stressful
4. Man, don't get angry!
In Buddhism, anger is considered to be the most negative force of all, because anger can destroy anything that is good at one stroke. And how often do we get angry about something or someone in a stressful everyday life? But the Buddhists say: getting angry doesn't get us any further. Rather, we should learn to control our negative emotions and practice calmness. Or as the Dalai Lama puts it: "Do not let the behavior of others disturb your inner peace." Specific example: a colleague accuses us of doing a bad job. Instead of getting angry and defending ourselves, we should stay calm and weigh up. If he is right, there is no need to be angry; we should learn from our mistake. If he's wrong, there's even less reason to be angry because we didn't do anything wrong and he was simply wrong.
5. Do exactly the opposite of what we actually feel like doing
Fire is not extinguished with fire, but with water. And it is the same with negative feelings such as anger and anger: the exact opposite is the solution. Let's imagine the following situation: You had a stressful day at work and you are walking on your gums anyway. In the evenings, pure chaos awaits you at home: the children have turned the apartment into a battlefield, your husband has not tidied up. First reaction: you get angry and swear. But honestly? This will probably only make things worse and end up feeling really bad. The Buddhists say in such a case: contrary behavior causes the opposite result. So next time, try to stay calm. Breathe deeply in and out, slowly count to 10, or step out of the room for a moment - whatever helps you. And then, think of the person you are angry with as a teacher. One who helps us to become more patient, understanding and friendly and thus brings us forward in the long term. As unusual as it may seem at first glance: Be grateful that this person brought you this situation in particular. Because in this way you can grow and become stronger (after all, patience in Buddhism is a sign of strength).
6. Be grateful for challenges
"Any difficult situation that you master now will be spared you in the future," says the Dalai Lama. Isn't that an inspiring attitude? And wouldn't we jump into the deep end much more often and just tackle challenges if we knew that they wouldn't come back afterwards? And if it does, we have already learned how to cope with the situation and it no longer needs to scare us.
7. That too will pass
There is a simple trick when the stress grows over your head again. Ask yourself: Will this situation here and now be even important to me in 10 years' time? Will I still be able to remember it when I'm dying? The answer will be "No!" 99.9% of the time. be. Buddhists make it very consciously clear that we humans are mortal and that everything around us is impermanent. With this perspective, a lot of things very quickly become unimportant. Simply because it is not worth spending your precious time on.
8. Set realistic goals
Focused, disciplined, content - these are important virtues in Buddhism. And that is exactly what helps us in everyday life to achieve our goals. For example, with the "Deep Work" working method: the cell phone and other disturbing influences are banned from the room for a period of time of your choosing in order to work concentrated and without distraction. If the time is up or the goal we have set for ourselves has been reached, we can devote ourselves to other things again. In this way, we can do more in less time than if we were constantly distracted in between. Buddhists also make sure that their goal is realistic and that they remain calm if something goes wrong.
9. Create islands of time
"Spend some time with yourself every day," advises the Dalai Lama. Not that easy in a stressful everyday life. Find specific moments in which you are only to yourself. For example, get up half an hour earlier and enjoy the morning alone, with yoga and meditation, for example. Spend your lunch break alone and sit down in your favorite café with a good book. Get off two stops earlier in the evening and take a relaxed walk home. There are many ways to just be for you. Use it!
10. Say no
Buddhists are kind beings. And yet they have learned one thing that we still find difficult: say no. Because they know exactly whether they can master a task or not. And they would never put themselves in a situation in which they could lose face and with it their self-confidence. So, the next time we know that a task is simply impossible to accomplish or would put us under too much pressure: smile in a friendly manner and say no. When in doubt, it is better than accepting everything and ending up swimming. Here we have a few extra tips for you on the subject of "learning to say no".
11. See the positive
Slept badly, headaches, trouble with the boss: there are many things that can really spoil your day. But the Dalai Lama says: "Nothing is more relaxing than accepting what is coming." In other words, those who do not feel sorry for themselves but make the best of the situation will grow with this challenge and find inner strength.
12. Only we can solve our problems
Buddha says: "Nobody saves us except ourselves. Nobody can and nobody is allowed to do that. We have to go the way ourselves." So when we are stressed, it is up to us to change this situation. We shouldn't miraculously wait for outside help. So: seek the conversation, specifically ask your colleague for support, involve your partner more in everyday family life - for example with a daily plan in which the tasks are clearly distributed.
13. Start everything with a smile
Whether we have to give an important presentation, calm down the crying baby or get stuck in a traffic jam again: Our own attitude towards things has a great influence on how things turn out. If we are tense and expect the worst, the situation will certainly not be as light as if we smile, take a deep breath and whisper to ourselves: "It will be fine". Buddhists try to start everything with a smile. And usually have great success with it.
14. The way is the goal
We are constantly rushing through the area, from one place to another, and our minds have long been to the next meeting, parents' evening, children's birthday party. Buddhists are experts in living in the moment, enjoying the moment. Just stop and look around. Watch the flower along the way, breathe in and out, close your eyes for a moment. In Buddhism, the way is the goal. It is more important to travel well than to arrive. A nice thought that should keep us grounded in the stressful everyday life.
15. Clean up your own life
Sometimes there is just too much of everything: too much stress in the office, too many appointments, too much stuff flying around at home. How easy it can be to concentrate on what is really important - and just let go of everything else. Finally muck out the closet and get rid of all the clothes that you don't wear anyway. Canceling the appointment with the colleague who talks way too much and just takes advantage of us. When we are ready to regularly clean out our lives, we feel more liberated, lighter and more with ourselves. Try it out!
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